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Embarrassed pirate picked nose with hook and needs patch.
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Pirate used hook hand to cover sneeze and poked eye out.
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Pirate goes to eyeball dispenser to get a replacement eyeball.
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Pirates fighting goes slowly because their eye patches affect their depth perception.
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Pirate questions privacy of wireless phone call with a talking parrot on the pirate's shoulder.
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Carpenter shopping for nails sees a pirate in the hooks and eyes section of hardware store.